Autumn conversation

Today we find Ardelia and Petal in their respective homes, Petal in the deep south, and Ardelia in Fargo of the frozen north. The two ladies are adjusting to their retirement homes, after sharing a home in the midlands for 18 years. We catch them on the phone this morning, reminiscing about the old days.

Petal: Do you remember the old days when we would just eat pie for dinner? We would call is shepherd’s pie, when it was really chocolate fudge crunch. I miss those days, dear.

Ardelia: Remember when we would go to the casino with my old boyfriend Bubba, and then tell our children that we were at our Tai Chi class? I miss those days, but I sure don’t miss getting up to go to work in the morning. Now the only thing I fib about is what time I got up today.

Petal: Some days I barely wake up all day, and I don’t feel a bit guilty about it. I like to wake up and read long enough to read myself to sleep. Retirement should be whatever each of us dreamt about all those years that we drug ourselves to work through the snow, rain, and cold.

Ardelia: I’m still surprised every day that I can do as much or as little as I want. Some days are writing days, some knitting days, some socializing days, and all of them are mine. How is Violet doing, and is Lavender adjusting to college?

Petal: Everyone is doing well. How do you feel about the political campaign, dear? Isn’t tonight another debate or something?

Ardelia: Well Petal, here’s how I feel about that. I’ve always been a tree-hugging liberal, but my biggest concern is that we get as far away from what we have now as possible. The country is swirling round and round, closer and closer to the drain. Change had better be right around the corner, as in Hurok Ohamba. I know I’ll be sporting his bumper sticker.

Petal: Oh Lord, Ardelia, I hope you’re sitting down. I just saw a news flash that Madonna is getting a divorce. I know it’s true because it was running along the bottom of the TV screen, and it had exclamation points.

Ardelia: Good grief ! You just can’t count on anything. Maybe we should make one of those divorce cakes we used to make. You know, the German chocolate one that we poked all the holes in, and filled them with Eagle Brand milk, and caramel iced cream topping. Then we sprinkled powdered sugar on it. Oh my goddesses, I’m starving.

Petal: I believe that I have everything here to make one. Let’s put them in the oven at exactly eleven o’clock. Does that work for you? I’m glad there’s no time difference between the deep south and the frozen north. We’ll have a great treat to eat during the presidential debate, dear.

Ardelia: It may be the only good thing about the debate, Petal. Call me tomorrow and tell me what you think, ok?

Petal: About the cake or the debate?

Ardelia: I sure miss you, dear.